Dangal the movie – 5 Reasons why it was overrated
Dangal the movie – 5 Reasons why it was overrated from a behavioral standpoint.
Dangal was a well directed film but I do not actually support Mr. Mahavir Singh Phogat’s behavior and methods displayed in the movie. Now I don’t know if the events that are shown are true or not and my analysis will be completely based on Child Psychology research findings and correlating then with the behavior displayed in the movie.
5 core emotional needs for children
1) Develop a secure attachment with their primary caregiver.
The 2 children were scared of their father. They were attached sure but they didn’t have much of a choice really at that age. They don’t know any other adult so obviously it came down to receiving their father’s validation.
2) Express themselves safely without fear.
In the absence of expressing themselves freely, the 2 children used lying, manipulating as a means to achieve what they wanted.
3) Need for unstructured spontaneity and play. The child takes the lead and the parent is a curious observer.
They never had any playtime. All they did was train.
4) Maintain individuality and independence.
This was taken away from them way long back. The father imposed his dreams to get Gold at the Olympics instead of finding out what the girls wanted.
5) Need for appropriate boundaries and discipline. This is critical to avoid children from becoming entitled and is not the same thing as punishing them. Many people confuse discipline with punishment which is far from the truth. This fundamentally focuses on their behavior and not shaming the child or deriding them in any which way.
The hair cutting scene and the marriage dance scene where the father slapped his daughters and humiliating the kids in front of the entire village was a horrible way to exhibit discipline. And this movie became a super hit in the year 2016 which only goes to show how certain parts of the world still are unable to distinguish discipline from punishment and humiliation. With many parts of the world, parenting often falls in extreme domains. Either kids are left doing whatever they want without appropriate boundaries or behavioral manners or they are punished for anything the parent finds inappropriate. As we can see, most societies who adapt this type of parenting style raise manipulating children who grow up to become manipulating adults. Just take a look at the the countries that are violent and narcissistic parenting is defined as normal and then correlate those statistics where you find the most amount of corruption and manipulating behavior. The answer lies in your observation.
The 5 basic core emotional needs for the children were not met. Sure India got the Gold and that may have been achieved with other participants in the entire village who may have genuinely been interested in wrestling and making it a career. But Mr. Mahavir Singh Phogat was a selfish man who wanted the Gold from his offspring. If he really cared about India getting the Gold, then he could’ve easily volunteered to coach anyone in the village who would’ve been interested in the sport irrespective of gender. Instead he chose to put his daughters in the Sport where they were least interested and if they didn’t follow what he said, he would humiliate them. He was least interested in what he could do for his country and was more interested in using his own children to achieve what he never could. His father never supported his dreams and he turned out to be a worse father, who imposed his own dreams on his kids and never really cared to find out what they really wanted. This was narcissistic behavior at its very best and many parts of the world support and glorify this behavior which is even more scary.
That in a nutshell was my problem with the movie.
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